Whew. What a week. Or weeks. It’s all starting to blur together now.
Searching, applying and interviewing for teaching jobs is really exciting, but I’m starting to feel drained by the whole process. Don’t get me wrong, I am so thrilled every time the phone rings (it’s been four times) and someone wants to interview me. But interviews are (and always have been) a form of medieval torture where you’re forced to walk into a room and tell strangers that you’re great and that they should trust you to meet all of their expectations and that they should hire you. And then, inevitably, some of those people pick someone else. And you’re understanding, but also you’re crushed, because you really believe yourself when you tell someone that you’re cut out for this job.
Doing all of this without even being licensed is like the normal amount of stress times a billion, because I am willing to bet that someone else has applied for the jobs who has a license/experience/isn’t in school/has spent more than 23 years on this planet. I don’t feel unqualified for the jobs I’m applying for. I really don’t. I just feel overshadowed.
I had one interview a few weeks ago, which I did not get. Then I had two interviews on Monday, and I am probably getting carpel tunnel from keeping my fingers crossed so very hard. I haven’t heard from either of those yet. And then a fourth interview this morning. And you know, I have yet to meet someone in an interview who is anything short of very nice. But still, the stress, oh man. I’m so ready for some answers.
And you know what else? It’s expensive. Over the course of interviewing, I have paid for some new clothes, lots of gas, resume paper, folders, ink, a new printer, more resume paper and some more gas. I’m amazed that I’m not broke(r) and crazy from the experience.
But I’ll keep it up. I will wait for the phone to ring, I will miss work to schedule the interview, I will wake up early, print my credentials, get dressed up, wear high heels and drive wherever I need to. Because no matter how stressed/exhausted/afraid/overshadowed I feel, I know I am in the right place, doing the right thing. And that is worth all of it.